This week had it all. Finally after a long wait of 9 days… Arnab returned to Times Now. Lets Have a look at the weeks events:
The nation was shocked and there was no one to ask the questions and get the direct answers. Rajdeep Sardesai finally found good days and was happy to see people finally accepting “credibility” over “chaos”. Meanwhile, facing the moment, Manmohan Singh said, with his smiling face (yes he did) ,”I am not the custodian of Arnab Goswami.Theeek Hai na?”. Some people say he is inspired by “Dreaming” Rahul Gandhi’s speech and has decided to work for only 100 days a year and eat 3-4 rotis.
In other inflating news, Apple announced that as part of its re-branding strategy for India, it will be call itself Onion. Apple CEO Tim Cook said that the move made perfect sense given that the onion is now perceived in India as a luxury good, connoting wealth and affluence, and yet is also a necessity with high utility, the same attributes that Apple would like its iPhones to be associated with. In tune with its new marketing strategy, its latest offering, the iPhone 5s, will feature a half eaten onion rather than an apple as its logo. Apple now plans to tie up with wholesalers and retailers to distribute iOnions as well. “Onion retailers will make very good salesmen for iOnions and we plan to set up over a million Apple stores in sabzi mandis through the length and breadth of the country. Over time we are sure iOnions will outsell onions since we don’t plan to aggressively raise prices over the coming years,” disclosed Apple’s head for sales and logistics in emerging markets. There were no immediate comments from Samsung. However, they are said to be watching several other vegetables with interest.
India finally had something to rejoice. Sonia Gandhi left the country and Narendra Modi celebrated his 63rd birthday. To celebrate his birthday, Narendra Modi brought a nice Italian cake and put up a tweet of him blowing out the candles. We have an exclusive image of Narendra Modi’s facebook wall. Here it is
Thank you for reading
This was a satire of the real news events that took place in the week